July 21, 2017

Seriously?

Assalamualaikum.

I know it's been quite a while now.
But honestly, Abe dop rasa macam positif sangat lately.
Jadi, Abe macam buat keputusan untuk fokus positif kan diri sendiri dulu sebelum sibuk nak ajak orang lain untuk sentiasa positif. At least, I am honest to myself. =)

tapi Abe terpanggil untuk meluahkan pendapat dalam satu isu yang terjadi dalam industri sekarang ini.

"PETISYEN BANTAH FATTAH AMIN JADI HERO COFFEE PRINCE"

Abe macam, "whattt theeeeeee...fish"

Abe rasa ni perkara yang agak berat dari apa yang kita nampak sebenarnya.
Betapa taksub nya seseorang boleh jadi pada sesuatu perkara itu sampai sanggup sekat rezeki orang.
Okay, memang betullah, kalau dia dapat memang rezeki dia. kalau tak dapat, bukan rezeki dia.
I know that.
And that's not what I'm sad about now.
tapi kesanggupan seseorang itu untuk sekat rezeki orang. effort tu. sampai buat petisyen.
Now, that's what makes me really sad.

Kenapa sampai tahap macam tu?

did it ever occur to you that whatever that you're doing right now ni sebenarnya menyekat rezeki orang?
Perbuatan tu.


Now, imagine this.
If you get promoted at work. Pihak atasan nampak kelebihan kamu. tapi rakan sepejabat kamu tak setuju (tak kisah lah sebab dengki, tak puas hati atau memang rasa kamu tak layak). Dan sebab majoriti tak bersetuju. Kamu terlepas peluang itu. Kamu tak sedih ke? Tipu lah tak sedih. Semua kerja nak naik pangkat, gaji banyak.
Dan macam mana pula kita nak tahu kebolehan seseorang kalau tak diberi peluang?
Ada fikir tak?

Being an artist, it's really not as easy as you think it is.
Kitaorang tak ada gaji tetap. pendapatan utama kami dari hasil kerja kami (lakonan, nyanyian, etc).
Bila dapat tawaran kerja (lakonan, nyanyian, etc), itu yang kita harapkan supaya tak perlu susah hati nak fikir apa nak buat next untuk earn money.

Untuk saya huraikan tentang isu yang nampak simple ni sebenarnya boleh jadi panjang lebar dalam entry kali ni. Tapi saya nak menaip pun tak rajin sangat sebenarnya.

All I'm asking for is for you guys to THINK.
Patut ke perbuatan kauorang diluar sana tu? menyekat rezeki orang sebab obseskan sesuatu benda itu. Really?
Sayang lah kalau mentaliti orang kita kebanyakannya masih diperingkat itu.
Kalau nak buat petisyen, buat lah petisyen untuk hala tuju negara kita ni ke atau apa-apa yang berfaedah. bukan siapa layak berlakon drama apa. Kalau suka sangat drama korea tu, jangan tengok yang adaptasi melayu ni punya. tak lah tercemar "sweet memory" kauorang dengan drama tu. Senang kan?

Boleh nampak kan? orang zaman sekarang suka memberat kan isu yang ringan & meringankan isu yang berat.

To end this short entry. I'd like to apologize to those who I've offended (through this entry).
Bukan niat Abe pun. Cuma nak kita sama-sama lebih matang dalam berfikir. Abe pun banyak sahaja yang tak matang dalam pemikiran dan perbuatan. mana -mana yang kauorang perasan tu, boleh lah tegur Abe. tak ada masalah.

Apa pun.

Think Positive. Be Positive  & Stay Positive.

Abe mu,
Hafreez Adam.


January 06, 2017

Imperfection

PERHATIAN,
POST INI DIBUAT PADA PERTENGAHAN TAHUN 2016.
AND IT'S BEEN IN MY DRAFT SINCE THEN BECAUSE I WASN'T SURE IF IT'S THE RIGHT TO THING TO DO. BUT (I) DECIDED TO POST IT TODAY BECAUSE I'VE DECIDED TO CARE LESS (ABOUT) WHAT NEGATIVE PEOPLE MIGHT SAY
AND CHOSE TO CARE (ABOUT)  WHAT POSITIVE PEOPLE MIGHT BENEFIT FROM THIS ENTRY. HAPPY READING!

_________________________________________________________________________________

So, I've stopped writing for quite a while now.
Agak sibuk 'juggle' benda-benda yang kita panggil "hidup, biasalah".

I kinda think that I need to slow things down a bit.
Sepanjang hampir 3 tahun karier saya sebagai pelakon. Saya boleh katakan dengan rendah dirinya, Allah permudahkan laluan saya.
Alhamdullillah.

Saya rasa sangat senang dengan perjalanan karier saya yang semakin selesa dari masa ke semasa. Up until kisah "Hafreez Trauma Jerawat Batu" menjadi bualan ramai.

Like what!?

Jangan kata umum, saya sendiri yang baca ni pun terkejut.

Get this right. Saya tak kecil hati pun dengan apa yang umum pertikaikan. Because if I were in your place, I'd probably find it rubbish too.
Banyak lagi benda yang boleh jadi news untuk diletakkan di muka hadapan akhbar.

Cuma benda yang saya rasa tak masuk akal bila umum (kebanyakan) cepat melatah. Tanpa membaca isi. Terus menghukum.
But I guess that's normal.
Manusia sekarang lebih terbuka menerima orang menghukum orang tanpa usul periksa daripada kisah jerawat batu di muka hadapan akhbar.
Menarik kan hidup kita manusia ni?
Negative.


I'm not here to explain myself. I did that already on my official Instagram.

I'm here to tell you guys what happened after that.

Cyber bullying.

Macam saya cakap tadi.
Manusia ni suka menghukum. Terlalu cepat menghukum.
Maka Twitter dan Instagram saya pun dihujani dengan "thoughts" dari mereka-mereka yang sememangnya cukup yakin dengan kesempurnaan diri mereka.
Di jadikan bahan lawak, caci, hina, kutuk, segalanya lengkap lah.
Tak apa. Dah nama pung "mamat trauma jerawat batu". Hati pung macam batu lah.

Waktu tu pula kebetulan tengah cuti, baru habis teater dan dalam persediaan untuk masuk shooting lain.
Jadi, sekali sekala goyang kaki dekat rumah sambil dapat pahala free kan. Why not?


Tahun lepas saya decide untuk be real pada mata umum.
Saya shoot drama Tersuka Tanpa Sengaja.
Saya mengalami alahan pada kulit disebabkan bedak yang digunakan make-up artis (bukan salah dia. bedak tu yang memang tak kena dengan kulit saya. Orang lain okay sahaja). Maka start lah muncul balik jerawat-jerawat pada muka saya.
Konon sebab nak bagi nampak muka saya bersih dalam TV, maka berniatlah make-up artis ni untuk menutup segala cela di muka saya dengan bahan-bahan make-up dia. Pesan saya dekat dia masa tu cuma satu ; "tak payah. Biarkan.". "tapi ni untuk siaran HD. Nanti nampak jelas semua (cela) ni." sambung si make up artis ini tadi. "It's OK. Biarkan. Biar orang tahu, pelakon pun tak lah perfect keadaannya" tegas saya pula.

Pergh! Rasa macam baca novel tak?

Long story short.

Apa yang anda lihat di TV. Bukan sebab make-up artis tak pandai buat kerja or production tak jaga.
Tapi sebab mereka hormat saya sebagai manusia biasa yang bekerja sebagai pelakon, ada mesej yang hendak dihantar kepada masyarakat diluar sana.

Tapi saya tak lah bermalas-malasan tak buat apa untuk perbaiki appearance ini. Saya cuba jaga sebaik mungkin. Sebab sedar bahawa production pun nak hasil yang cantik-cantik untuk products (drama/film) keluaran mereka.

I was lucky, sebab producers drama berkenaan faham mesej yang hendak saya sampaikan kepada masyarakat. Kita terlalu disajikan dengan "kesempurnaan" dan "kecantikan" didalam TV & Magazines. Secara tak langsung, kita mendidik masyarakat apa itu definasi "sempurna" dan "cantik".
sampaikan bila orang ada flaws dekat luar, kita rasa mereka tak "sempurna" dan "cantik".
Sebab tu bila orang ada kekurangan, mereka dihina, caci dan sebagainya.

Kenyataannya, tak semua manusia ni dilahirkan sempurna secara fizikal nya.

What I wanted to do was, to teach, at least, my community (HHFC), that it's okay not to be okay or perfect. I want them to appreciate people with flaws. Sebab kebanyakan manusia tak sempurna ni lah yang paling baik kau boleh jumpa. Sebab mereka sedar diri. kekurangan mereka.
tapi untuk mereka yang ada kekurangan ni pula. Jangan pernah rasa diri itu kurang dari mereka yang sempurna (physically). Kamu boleh makan sendiri, pakai baju sendiri, melihat, bercakap, berjalan, berfikir, bekerja dan sebagainya sendiri, then, Kamu juga sebenarnya Sempurna.

Pada Abe, kesempurnaan dan kecantikan datangnya dari peribadi seseorang. How YOU carry yourself.
Beradab, sopan, positif.

Abe sendiri tengah belajar untuk menjadi seorang yang sentiasa beradab dan positif.
tapi bukan senang. Susah sebenarnya untuk sentiasa tersenyum bila orang sentiasa menumbuk dinding hati kau.

Sebab tu, sesiapa yang naturally seorang yang bersopan dan sentiasa positif. Pada mata Abe. Dia sempurna dan cantik. Sebab dengan sikap macam itu lah. mereka sentiasa disenangi dimana-mana.

To end this entry. I'd like to say something.
"Try to look beyond physical"

Kenal. faham. hargai.
Keunikan masing-masing.


May God bless us all.

Think Positive, Be Positive and Stay Positive.


Sincerely,
Abe mu,
Hafreez Adam




March 16, 2016

You Have To Just Deal With It

Bismillah Al Rahman Al Rahim,
Assalamualaikum,

Got back from dinner with a childhood friend of mine whom I cut myself from for almost 4-5 years.

Well, shit happens in life. Arguments or misunderstandings or disagreements inevitably occur no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try to avoid it.

Normal la not kalau gaduh, we tend to avoid each other. That tension creates space and soon we build walls or barriers. The next thing you know, you adapt to that void which were once filled by your friend. Its part of human nature to protect themselves from harm, be it physically, psychologically or spiritually. We reject and flush what upsets us out from our system.


But then, as for me, I'm already at an age (I feel so old for saying this blergh) where I can't afford to lose friends anymore. Good friends. Best friends. Close friends. You name it. Why? Cause it's so God damn difficult to have a new one. You need time to nurture as well as grow friendships and I just don't have that luxury to do so.  

So I chose to suck it up. To basically be an adult. If there is any conflict, sort it out. Apologize. Put it behind. Move on. Don't be bitter about it. Don't take it to the heart. Cause I just can't afford to go through another bloody long years of cold war over differences that by right we should have accepted it the moment we became friends. I just can't and I won't. I just don't have that capacity to go through it anymore.

So, here I am, letting go of my grudges of those who have wronged or hurt me. Letting go of my pain, fear of being alone. Letting go of my frustration and anger. I'm just glad that two of long lost friends contacted me again, we met and had an amazing time catching up and concluded life is too good to hold grudges against each other.

If your friends pissed you off, probably you should evaluate the friendship but if it were your best friends instead, just forgive and forget. Be the bigger person in life. They fall in that exception category right, so deal with it. LOL. No really. Trust me. Why would you do that to yourself right?  Why you wanna be sad about it? Ok now go call them and be happy.


Written by,
Aiman Ariffin 





September 08, 2015

The Unexpected

Bismillah Al Rahman Al Rahim,
Assalamualaikum,

Bersawang dah blog ni. Been pestering adam to update it but as you may already know, he is extremely busy with his work. One after another. I didn't wanna keep on posting my writing. Bosan plak orang baca huhu but then since adam insisted that I should just post whatever I feel like writing, so here we go! Just wanna share a story that is quite significant to me. An experience that I've earned unexpectedly.

So, after rejecting medicine, I didn't know what I want to do in life (fuuh, ayat drama). As a profession. My future was bleak. So my parents stood up and gave me the opportunity to study accountancy & finance.

I never liked accounting to be honest, but yeah, parents knows best for you kan? So blaja je la. Coming from a pure science background, those accounts subjects are like alien to me. Double entry, book keeping, balance sheet, depreciation, yadida yadida my gad! hate it. Balance sheet slalu tak balance >_< cash flow slalu hancus T_T.

But then what to do. I was already pursuing my degree in overseas and theres no way turning back after knowing how much my parents invested in me. Memang sah kena lempang kalau kata nak balik  Malaysia lol.

So I kept on denying that feeling. I forced myself to absorb everything that've been taught and then vomit everything during exam. I literally survived like that through out the whole course of Accountancy & Finance. *fuuh lap peluh.

Ehcehwah, tayang gambar graduation sikit
Came back Malaysia, then got an offer to work at one of the biggest accounting firm in the world as an external auditor. Fuuh, excited dia lain macam sikit. No, honestly, I was looking forward to working life hoping that it would be so much more kinder to me.

Having that mindset in place, my oh my how wrong was I. I hated the job. Working around the clock. Lack of resources. Constant pressure from client and bosses. High expectations from superiors. No weekends and the list goes on and on and on. I still remember how much I wanted to resign on the first week of my probation. So pathetickan. What a noob -.-"

I never did any internship before (Why would I wanna work during holidays right? huahua) I mean, I never knew working life can be so so so different from how I imagined it to be. How naive. How lame of me, yeah i know. 

EVERYBODY thought I couldn't last even for a month. When I say everybody means EVERYONE, all of them. My colleagues. My friends. My family.

But what they didn't know, what I didn't know was that, no matter how bad you dislike something, or someone, or anything, you can learn/grow to like it/them. So slowly, I grew liking what I was doing. Of course, with the help of supportive family, colleagues and friends (listening to me ranting about how stressful work is lol you can ask adam, dia selalu jadi mangsa huhu)

But then, I managed to stay in the firm longer than most of my batch. You have to understand, the turn over rate in my company is exceptionally super high. The number of people in and out is like liquid, so volatile. To stay long in the firm is actually an achievement. Really. 

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is, don't ever look down at other people when they are going through crisis cause at the end of the day, they might do better than you do and to never give up. Cause you yourself might surprise what you can actually do. Cause I definitely surprised myself. You'll never know how far you can go until you push yourself to YOUR limit

But I left the firm due to family reasons. Mom's not feeling well so being the youngest in the family with no commitment what so ever, I've decided to be take a break from my career life to focus on my mom (Nicer way to say that I'll be bumming around huhu)

Since I'm unemployed, I've been actively seeking for new opportunities. So I'll share my interview tips with you guys out there who are currently looking for a job in my next post. InsyaAllah.

Till then, stay positive, have an open mind and be strong.

Written by,
Aiman Ariffin


June 20, 2015

My Mom Has Cancer

Assalamualaikum,
Bismillah Al Rahman Al Rahim,

"Mom's diagnosed with cancer"

My entire body froze when I heard the news. Every single molecule in my body was trying to reject and deny what I've just heard. I can hear my sister's sob on the other line. Trying her best to be strong but it was futile.

I don't know what to say. I don't know what to feel. I don't know what to think. I have no words of comfort for her, not even for myself. Silence. I was pulled into a pitch-black space with so many voices of my own echoing all over. I was frightened. I was filled with fear. I was haunted by the thought that mom was about to die. So many emotions. So many questions. All mixed up. I was submerged into my own internal dialogue.

"I'm not ready"

"I am just not ready

"How can I face all this"

After a while, we hung up. I was still in disbelief. I stood there, zoning into void. Excused myself from the meeting and rushed to the prayer room. I let my worried and sad heart make peace by the waves of ablution. 

I pulled myself together. I searched and gathered all the strength that I can muster to clear up my head and pray. Duaa. I seek tranquility, peace and guidance. After a while, I picked up my phone and I texted my sister. 

"We have to accept the fact that our life will change"



I walked back to the audit room and resume my work. I didn't bother calling anyone else nor bother informing anyone. I didn't think any words or any forms of comfort from anyone can put my heart at ease.
"Shhhh It's fine" - The Sekolah Series by Caryn Koh

But then again, this is not the time for me to be sad. Not the time to be depressed. Not the time to be lost in translation. I'm not the one who is going through it. I need to focus on my mom's health mentally, physically, emotionally.

But how do I do that?

So I started to educate myself with cancer. I learn more on the prognosis. I learned about the types and the survival rate. The treatment options. Chemo? Surgery? Radiation? Hormonal? The side effects of each treatments. The risks.  I was glad that I took the initiative to know what I don't know because learning something about cancer calmed some of those terrors

Cancer has always existed among humans.

So I couldn't stop myself from pondering on the bigger questions such as why was there no cure yet? and I would google for biographies of those who had tried and the reasons why they had failed.  The more I read the more I think and the more messed up I get. (With all the medical jargons gosh) So I told myself, let's just worry and focus on things that we have control on and let HIM decide on the others (things beyond our control). So keep on praying and hold on tightly to your faith towards HIM.

Alhamdulillah, the surgery went well and the Doctor said that the cancer was at Stage 1. So there's no need for chemo, radiology or hormone therapy. However, mom would need to go hospital for checkups for the next 5 years. Alhamdulillah. I was relieved. It was like a huge burden were lifted off my shoulders at an instant. 

Most importantly, this experience has prepared me so much. For the next time the disease or other kind of disease strikes, whether that be within myself or within a member of my family or even against one of my friends. I know that this will come eventually since 1/3 of us will develop cancer in our lifetimes (Not to scare you, but the reality is true as it is). When we count our families and our friends it is evident that we will all be touched in some time, some how, some way. You never know. 

And I have learned that ignorance is no way to deal with itWe hear a lot of stories, from the movies, from songs. They tell us to love our loved ones before it is too late. There's also this saying you will never learn until it really happen to you. So. 

Cherish your loved ones before it's too late. 



Written by,
Aiman Ariffin
p/s: I tried to summarize the story as short and condense as possible, sorry if you find it really confusing





May 11, 2015

Beautiful : #WeSmile



So, wherever I go, whatever I read (on my social media), whoever I meet,
semua tanya soalan sama.
'What happened? Share please'.

No secret.
Saya masih sama macam dulu. Skin saya tak flawless pun. Cuma tak seteruk dulu sahaja.
I shared my past sebab nak motivate others to help themselves.
When it went viral. Saya terkilan dengan banyak perkara.
Tapi kita letak semua itu ditepi.

The main reason why I posted that entry was because ; I wanted to help others, to help themselves.

When I was who I was. Saya tak ada sesiapa to look up to yang jadi motivation untuk saya get better. But I was lucky that I had my sisters & my closest friends. They helped me. they brought out the best in me
And so here I am now, with the help of many (people).

But still, that was not the point of my entry. That wasn't the moral of the story.
The point was, having faith in yourself can change a lot of things.  Not only for you yourself. But the people around you, too.

It's about improving yourself. Its about getting a better version of you or better yet, the best version of you.
Dan sebab I thought it's better untuk jadikan kisah saya sendiri sebagai contoh terbaik. Saya kongsikan. Because it happened to me. It's a real story. And I don't mind at all untuk orang tahu how I was back then. Because how I am now. Tak banyak beza pun sebenarnya.

Apa yang anda lihat di kaca tv, majlis hiburan atau apa sahaja berkaitan kerjaya saya sebagai pelakon. That's work.

di luar zon kerja saya. Saya masih orang yang sama. Mungkin bukanlah orang yang pakai baju atau seluar oversized. Atau mungkin bukanlah mamat yang rambut dia mengerbang tak disikat. Tapi cara saya masih sama. Cuma appearance wise, I am a better version of myself now. Improved. Kita hidup. Kena sentiasa baiki diri menjadi lebih baik dari masa ke semasa.

Saya nak beri harapan pada mereka yang low self confidence, yang insecure dengan diri sendiri atau mungkin mereka-mereka yang dilabel sebagai "geek", "weirdo", "nerd", dan lain-lain diluar sana untuk percaya pada diri sendiri. Untuk tidak terus dibuli oleh mereka yang mempunyai minda sempit bahawa indah fizikal itu adalah segalanya.

We are all humans. Sama sahaja.
Some of us (humans) are lucky enough dikurniakan fizikal yang menarik.
Tapi pada yang kekurangan dari apa segi segala pun (gemuk, berjerawat, berpenyakit, dll). Bukan bermakna mereka 'hodoh' (siapa kita nak label orang hodoh?') atau tidak menarik.
Who are we to judge?

berpijaklah dibumi yang nyata.


Jadi untuk menjawab soalan yang sering ditanya pula. Apa yang saya guna dulu. I used Clearasil (light blue packaging). Tapi product tu dah tak ada jual dah pun.

And I have decided to not say anything about whatever 'penyampai berita' put up on their blogs/anything out there. Sebab nanti akan jadi habit, orang lain create story. Saya pula kena jawab. Jadi lepas ni. Saya mengambil pendekatan positif untuk membiarkan sahaja apa-apa cerita yang keluar.

Tapi, satu sahaja nak cakap, 'Udang bakar yang saya makan hari tu sedap!'. ;)




I think what's imperative here is, to love ourselves first.
I want you guys to help yourselves.
Don't rely on others to tell you just how beautiful you are.
It might not be physical sometimes.
It could be your soul,
It could be the way you laugh,
It could be the way you stare,
It could be anything.
Bring out the best in you.
Trust me, we are all beautiful in our own unique way.
don't forget to thank God for that.

untuk luaran pula. biarlah semuanya berubah secara perlahan-lahan.
Don't rush things.
Because we might forget to live.
I've wasted few years of my life locking myself up for all the wrong reasons.
And I can never get that years of my life back and fill it with great memories.
I lost my chance.
Don't do that to yourself.
Live.
have faith.
because...





 



..GOD HAS CREATED US BEAUTIFULLY
whatever they say,
keep in mind that,
WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL. =) "
- Hafreez Adam





Jadi, apapun orang cakap.
Just smile.
Love yourself.
Take a selfie and post it.
Let the whole world see just how happy you are.
Just how beautiful you are.
Apa sekali pun orang cakap.
Kita senyum.

and don't forget to hashtag #WeSmile
I'll find you guys there ;)


p/s : and my advice guys, "Don't trust the internet. Whatever you read. trust nothing."




Written by
Hafreez Adam

May 06, 2015

Why Am I Single?

Assalamualaikum,
Bismillah Al Rahman Al Rahim,

It's 6 in the morning and I can't sleep. The head won't stop thinking. Trying to answer a question that has been bugging me for years. 

Why am I single?

Work commitment used to be the main reason (or should I say an excuse? lol) for not getting into a relationship. On a second thought, I'm gonna take it back, I don't think work commitment is an excuse, if I can't make time for my close friends what makes you think I have time for my other half? (ok, I'm assured now that it's not a petty excuse lol)

So now, since I'm no longer working at the moment, what's stopping myself from having one? Well, after giving some thought, I probably am a picky person when it comes to this area, or most likely I'm not trying hard enough to mingle and meet new friends, or perhaps I'm comfortable being single since I'm constantly being surrounded by friends. Yeah that might be the case (the privilege of having friends at different time zones countries so I won't be lonely regardless during the day or night)

In all probability, HE might want me to focus on HIM more right now. Who knows right? 

Besides, being single is not as bad as you think. When I think about it, those precious time alone gives me the opportunity to read, to paint, to draw, to sleep, to worry less, to not be serabut with drama, to not feel insecure, to basically have more time to concentrate on myself more. Becoming an adult, a more full and happy version of myself. 

I'm not saying that you shouldn't fall in love. I'm not saying that you should let yourself dwell in isolation. Just don't be weary about it. Brush it off if your friends make fun of it, ignore it if your relatives kept on asking about it.  

The time will come for each one of us to meet our eternal love. InsyaAllah. Kalau ada jodoh tak kemana right? In addition, what's the point of rushing it. When you rush things, you build expectation on people and if anything goes wrong, that disappointment is entirely a construction of your own expectations. So don't do that.

Because at the end of the day, we only have control on our own care and affection.
So right now, I'm just gonna paint, write, run till my lungs give out.



Written by:
Aiman Ariffin